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By Tom Bell

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It started out as a very civilised affair. A few hundred people in debonair fancy dress boarded the Circle Line armed with Martinis and witty banter. The intention was to prove to Boris that Londoners are civilised folk who are perfectly able to have a quiet drink on the train without shouting abuse and stabbing people to death.

Then the rabble descended - fully grown men dressed as vikings, beer-swilling Australians and screeching banshees brandishing their Smirnoff Ices - and complete mayhem ensued. The news reports the next day talked of station closures, assaults on tube drivers and multiple arrests. And so Boris Johnson proved his point conclusively. YOU IDIOTS!!

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BORIS'S BOOZE UP written by Tom Bell

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