When some people tell you they’d like to contribute an article for the Space issue, you just know it’s going to be some real deep and profound astronomical reflection on our place in the universe. And when some people tell you they’d like to contribute an article for the Space issue, you know it’s going to be about shit, fannies and bumholes. Here’s something from Raj, about urban slang, modern society’s tendency to scrabble towards the extreme in search of new excitement… and shit, fannies and bumholes.

Space Docking: The act of defecating directly into one’s vagina. Like a space ship attempting to dock to a space station, "space docking" involves very accurate control and near-perfect alignment of the two orifices. 

Source: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=space+docking  

One day, space docking will be the norm. Space docking will be the new kissing. Couples in the back row of cinemas will be lining up, a-hole to muff, perched and squatted on the arms of the cheap polyester chairs, taking aim and “dropping the kids off” in excited first-date enamoured wet vaginas. 

People get bored and move on to new freaky shit. I bet if R Kelly was a construction worker, and not an R’n’B superstar, he wouldn’t be pissing on 14 year old girls. He has probably got so much access to groupie-pussy that he needs to try new things just to raise a semi hard-on. 

Apparently, according to a guy I know in the music industry (or maybe it was a guy in the pub), P Diddy gets guys to blow him. According to the rumour, he does not do it because he is gay but because he has so much access to sweet pussy that he gets guys to blow him because he gets a power-trip knowing he is the Dog’s Bollocks in the Manhattan party-scene. He can get it off anyone – that’s gangsta! If you call him a fag for doing that, then you are just straight “playa-hating” (apparently). 

The same guy in the pub reckons that Tom from Myspace has got to have moved on to Space Docking by now. The guy is worth more than the world itself and must have 8 billion Myspace messages a day from women offering to blow him… I’m pretty sure he is bored it of it by now and just replies with an auto-reply message: “Have you heard of Space Docking?”  

What girl in her right mind wouldn’t let Tom space dock them? One beautiful day, I will get to Space Dock Fondue with Tom and his high-rolling pals.