Magazine / Radar / London

Uncle Narstie

Some amazing advice from South London's greatest Agony Uncle.

Written by Jack Blocker / 27 Feb 2013
Uncle Narstie

I’ve never given anyone advice after I’ve smoked Marijuana. Once when I was high, a woman asked me the best way to get to the train station. Fuck that- I ran home and watched the Food Network for three hours just to try and forget that nightmare. Fortunately not all people are like me, especially South London MC Big Narstie. He’s been doling out sage advice behind a thick cloud of smoke for the past few months, and I’ve selected four videos that can teach all of us a few things.

"I think my girl cheated on me in Napa"

Narstie confirms that the foundation of any successful relationship is built on trust. Nevertheless, you shouldn't let your girlfriend go on holiday to Ayia Napa, especially if she is a Bizzle.

 

"My man calls me bitch"

Narstie explains how the monotony of a domestic partnership can lead to a reductive dynamic between couples. Consequently, the more frustrated party is prone to invective remarks.

 

"Girls made me take drugs"

The fairer sex has perplexed many a man, and this poor soul has become dependent on drugs to improve his courting skills. Narstie states that a cavalier confidence is key, suggesting the viewer ‘beat it up like a racist Fed’.

 

"My Uncle got deported to Ghana"

Immigration is a complex socio-political issue that can lead to the disintegration of familial bonds. Particularly when you have sex with your recently deported Uncle’s girlfriend. Suggesting you have to break something down before it can be rebuilt, Narstie advises the man that his ‘soul is dogshit’.

 

Thank you to Grime Report TV for creating these videos. Check out more of Big Narstie's work over at his website.

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