Interview courtesy of www.b3ta.com.

Wilf Lunn is a British national treasure and creative genius. He appeared weekly on the British television show "Vision On" demonstrating his latest inventions with Tony Hart and Sylvester McCoy. From the Bicycle in a Bottle to the Halitosis High Breathing Hat, he's been making stupid stuff for years that puts most of us to shame.

B3ta tracked him down in his shed and got the B3ta boarders to ask him pointless questions.

What's the most embarrassing thing you've done for money or sex?

Lead a parade of women Morris dancers through Holmfirth. Fire myself across the river Irk. The headline in the paper read 'Berk falls in the Irk'.

What's the funniest thing that's happened to you while using public transport?

I was upstairs sitting on the next to the back seat on the 64 bus from Bradford to Huddersfield. Two young fellows on the back were laughing. One kept saying, "Go on, you got to do it." The other said, "Don't be stupid." "Yes, you got to, it says up there." He pointed to a sign, "Anything found on this bus must be handed to the conductor." I couldn't resist, so I leaned over to look. There in the middle of the seat was a raw egg, no shell, just an egg.

Is your moustache difficult to train? Do you use a special wax on it?

No it is not difficult to train. I no longer use wax because I use a lot of pyrotechnics and did occasionally fire to it with paraffin - a waxed moustache can catch fire like a candle. So I use soap. On shows I have burnt one end completely off - makeup would then cut hair off the back of my head and stick it on my face.

Dog, Cat or Walrus?

Definitely Walrus.

Who is your favourite murderer?

Landru, (incidentally I've actually got a letter written by Crippen).

Should it be legal to ride a bike on the motorway?

If it was legal it would certainly cull the cyclists.

What thrills you more: making things physically or thinking of them?

Thinking of them and talking about them - the finished object never matches up.

In the event of the end of the world, what would be the last thing you'd do before death?

I'm constantly being told at the end I would turn to God. I always point out it was your God that made me an atheist. I have been teetotal for fifteen years, so I would turn to drink.

What is the most annoying thing you have ever invented?

The flatulence wind chimes.

Gadgets & Money or Special powers?

Definitely special powers - all the others, if needed, would come from it.

Who's the better inventor, you or B.A Baracus from the "A Team"?

Do you need to ask?

You worked with Janet Ellis on Jigsaw - did you fancy her?

No